Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
