I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
