But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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