at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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