doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
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