Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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