Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
