I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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