Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
