Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
