??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize