if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
