bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm both gender and math confused
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
