What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Can you bring me the toilet please
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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