You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
