I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
