I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
operation have a gay friend backfired
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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