we're blogging at a bar
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
