Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Randomize
