glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
