Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
he was CRYING into my vagina
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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