I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Randomize
