Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
