I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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