Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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