I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
