$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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