come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
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you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
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That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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