Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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