So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
