Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize