I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
