oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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