I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
