I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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