OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
