For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
