The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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