I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize