flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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