There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
