Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(864): View more from South Carolina

you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.

Fav 40 871 5000
share tweet
(918): View more from Oklahoma

eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet

Fav 7 802 4250
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(405): View more from Oklahoma

I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.

Fav 13 4796 1529
share tweet
(650): View more from California

Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.

Fav 31 14389 1382
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(812): View more from Indiana

At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.

(1-812): View more from Indiana

Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).

Fav 23 1119 3042
share tweet
(647): View more from Ontario

I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.

Fav 8 1426 917
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(313): View more from Michigan

No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.

Fav 9 990 1566
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers

Fav 4 909 563
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(612): View more from Minnesota

I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.

(1-612): View more from Minnesota

sorry? thank you? I love you?

Fav 1 654 175
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT