The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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