singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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