To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Terrible idea I love it
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize
