Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
