wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
