: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
