he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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