i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
