Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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